Turning a new leaf?

So I've decided that I should write again.. at the very least I can do the following -

1. VENT
2. Get my brains working
3. VENT 

Not that I have much to vent (eventhough VENT's listed twice).. 

But I am thinking of moving on from blogspot. So here goes nothing ..

http://needlesslycomplicated.wordpress.com/

-nervosa-much-L

2 years have passed!!??!

WOWWWWWWW...

It's been a WHILE!

So I am thinking of writing again, but it's been so long that I have forgotten everything - seriously, I even forgot the password.. And had to reset, and the funniest bit was the secret question.. That threw me off.. And to tell you the truth, I chuckled a little, hmm, things HAS changed indeed.

My questions are....

1. Should I continue using this same blog, or start over a new one?
2. How the heck do I blog from an iPad (testing this as we speak)??
3. Re connect with my other fellow bloggers??????

In the hopes to kick start this again, I AM BACCKKKKK people!!

Savvy????

-L

Love

People dive into blow holes, jump from a speeding boat to water planes, run miles on end, jump off a cliff and learn how to tango.

For love.

Some people don't.

Sometimes in life and love, you don't get what you want but it doesn't mean you don't deserve them.

We all dream of that one person that'll do anything and everything for you, because of you. And you would be the reason for all that is great in him, and only bring out the best in him.

I'm a hopeless romantic, emotionally high maintenance and fiercely loyal to those who has my trust.

And I know one day, someone will also say to me that famous line from As Good As It Gets, (or something along that line..)

"I might be the only person on the face of the earth that knows you're the greatest woman on earth. I might be the only one who appreciates how amazing you are in every single thing that you do, and how you say what you mean, and how you almost always mean something that's all about being straight and good. I think most people miss that about you, and I watch them, wondering how they can watch you pass by and never get that they just met the greatest woman alive.."

This is a new stage in my life. There won't be people jumping off a ship after me nor will there be anyone who would run into a burning building for me. There is no more love. I have to accept that. But, I will always have the type of love that will come to you when you feel all is hopeless, or when you sob yourself over something that hurts so bad.

And for that I'm grateful.

And for that I still believe in love..

-L

What are you ready for?

I am ready for a holiday.

I definitely deserve it. I'm thinking, sun, sand, waves, palm trees, oversized sunglass (done!), large brimmed straw hat (check!). Maybe Pangkor Laut again.. or maybe Langkawi. Ni-mu in tow of course.

Things have been so hectic lately, that this dream of holidaying will have to take a backseat for now. I guess I can still look good with oversized sunglasses and large brimmed straw hat at the apartment's pool ..

I should start looking for a swimsuit.

-so-not-bikini-ready-L

A wish was all it took.

She snores.. and I don't mind it a bit.

She's my sunshine, every little bit of her has me written all over it. The way she articulate herself, her love for japanese food, her expressions.. But what I'm most proud of her is the strength she has. So strong, she keeps me from falling apart.

I wonder if my mom looks at me and feel the same way. Of course we've had our differences, and lately I do feel like I have failed her, and wondered if I have failed my little mini me.

Just as she was falling asleep, she said,"Happy Mother's Day Mum.. I love you..", I knew I have not failed her.. and with that I knew instinctively that when I said "Happy Mother's Day Mummy!", just now over dinner that I have not failed my mom too.

Happy Mothers Day! I am me because of you.

-mummy-L

Good news, bad news

The thing with bad news - good news is, you always have to choose which one you would want to hear first.

Sometimes I wish I don't have to choose between the two. But life's like that, right? In fact, Life's all about the good, the bad and the ugly. So I guess I may as well brace myself for whatever comes next.

So f*^k the bad news..

Am moving forward. Straight to the fridge first..

-L

Not so SUNny Day

Sometimes Sunday can be a not so "sunny" day..

Sometimes it's dark..
Sometimes it rains..
Sometimes you're alone..

Sometimes you're just angry..
Sometimes you're just weepy..
Sometimes ..

Well, sometimes you just can't finish what you started and that makes me mad and sad.

-L

So near yet so far

Jason is coming.. and yours truly have not made any progress in getting the tickets.. Life's been complicated. Not just "needlessly complicated".. really, truly complicated. So many balls in the air, and I know one of them is going to drop very soon.. That's life.

So I am crossing my fingers and toes that I'd be able to get to see Mr. Mraz.. And if I can be so bold.. I'd ask him to hold my heart in his hand... Well, we all know that's not going to happen since it will mean instantaneous death.. and however complicated it is, my life is all I have and I ain't gonna waste it!

-strong-but-needy-L

Yoohoooo Frank!

The tailored black suit.
The sleek black Audi.
The non-chalant fighting skills.
The clean, crisp white shirt.
And the body underneath.

Delicious.

What are the odds of finding a guy called Frank who drives a bad ass Audi here?

Probably none.

There might just be a Frankie, though...

-i-want-to-be-transported-L

Hello '09!

The first day of 2009. Wow. It's finally here. I'm a little embarassed to say this but I bought my '09 planner in October, and was looking forward to jotting down many appointments and schedules.. So far, I only have a trip to Bandung penned in.

I ended '08 grooving to Mama Mia!.. and started '09 in high def.. via Blue Ray, plenty of fireworks, from here to "Klang" (according to Entrepreneurina) thanks to Mr. & Mrs Shell kind invitation. Lunch was surprisingly pleasant and a cosy dinner for three. An email saying my team has hit last year's sales projection.. Positive bank balance (albeit not so healthy..), my "Benefit a.k.a Dr Becky" project still going strong..

So far so good. And now, to fill my cute little planner up.. Lunch, anyone?

-Rah!-Rah!-L

You jump, I jump, right?

A couple of nights ago, I saw Titanic, yes, the movie.. with that haunting song that goes on and on.

That was my second time watching it. And I remembered exactly who I watched it with the first time around, and more importantly who I was as I sat there telling myself that I too will find somebody who will jump, if I jump.

Bollocks.. I know.. but I was a wide eyed girl who's heart just got broken to pieces then. I desperately wanted to believe that Titanic love IS out there, and that my Leonardo WILL find me as I look out to the world looking lost and forlorn.

Now, 11 years later, I'm a different person, but as I watched the old lady telling her tale all over again, I'm reminded of something I've forgotten for a very long time. And I must never forget it again.


-on-the-trampoline-of-life-L

What I want for Christmas..

Dear Santa,

I've been a good girl this year. Very good indeed.

Earlier, via my usual good thoughts chanelling session, I've sent you a list of what I really.. really want for Christmas. If those are too much to ask, I will be happy with just request #3.

Thanking you in advance,
Good-L, not to be confused with goodie-goodie-L

Book number #2

I am in the middle of reading another book. Yes. Slowly but surely, I'm reading the books that was bought perhaps years ago.

As I mentioned in a previous entry, The Kite Runner was fabulous.. (and so was the movie).. cried loads, of course.

And now I am reading Eat. Pray. Love (again, finally!!!) . I'm only half way through but I can't help but wonder if all Liz's in the world have conversations with themselves in their head.. because I certainly do..

CBF (that's Chief Baker Fairy) asked me a couple of days ago if I had read it, and I said no.. but I have it.. and so here I am reading it.. It's like reading a a transcript of what goes on in this streaked head of mine. I am still on the first part of the book, Italy.. and she's making me hungry for pizza..and take up Italian language so I can do tandem conversation exchange with Italian men...

But most importantly, it reminded me of the great times I had while I was there, years ago.. walking hand in hand, talking, watching the countless fontanas, taking beautiful pictures and eating all those wonderful gelatos.

-bookie-L

Yooo Hoooo... Where are you?

I'm losing my mind..

Where's that thing that makes my cheek glow? My lips moist and plump..? My eyes sparkle..?

It's all gone missing..

Where are you my dear?

Where's my freaking make up pouch???????!!!!!

-plain-L

Happy Birthday Sayang

Little Ni-Mu is 3!!! Threeeeeeee!! Wheeeee!!!


Jumping up and down the trampoline.

Running around the obstacle course game.

Blowing her candles.

Eating the icing off the Princess cake.

Jumping up and down the trampoline.

Showing off her sticker tattoos.


I am so proud of her, I can burst! And I love her so much.
And you know what else 23rd November marks?
My 3rd year of motherhood. I wouldn't trade it for anything else..

-Mummy-Mama-L

Life's a bitch

AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaarrrRRRRRRRRrgggggggggggGGGGGggggHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH..

There are times when you just want to scream but can't.. Throw things, but you stop yourself, because you know you're the one who has to clean it up, so you stop yourself. And you ask yourself over and over again why you feel the way you do? Feeling like your chest is going to explode because you just don't know what to do... Above all, you feel invisible.. that even if you scream from the top of your lungs, no one can hear you.. or worse, no one wants to hear you..

Of course, the kitchen is in a mess, the laundry bag is full, there's still water leaking in the guest toilet .. and there's no room for you on the sofa.

I. Am. You.

My Merry Life

My Ni-Mu, who's going to be three in a couple of weeks makes a lot of logic with her toddler talk, than most adults. It's no wonder she's now my confidante.

Yesterday, when I introduced her to a dear friend who's leaving her past behind to start a fresh new life continents away, I said, "This is aunty Yants, she's getting married .. Do you know what getting married is?"

Yes...

It's like a Merry Go Round..

Brilliant logic. My Child is a genius. It's very much like a Merry Go Round, no? You go round and round in a circle with plenty of ups and downs thrown in for good measure.

-round-and-round-L

In the still of the night..

Hang on, help is on the way, stay strong
Hold your own, know your name and go your own way
And everything will be fine..

Croons Jason Mraz, as I stare into the darkness of the room.

So I channelled him, and in my mind we were sitting across each other, the room flickered with that lavender scented candle.

Why do we keep on paving over paradise? Because we’re only human, he said
Why do I have to go to the toilet so often? You have weak bladder, hon...
Can I have a hug? You don’t have to ask, hon..
I'm so tired.. Come rest with me, hon..

That wasn't so hard.. I should do this more often..

I think I'm in love with my iLuv, help!

-L

Worthy of a note..

Please take note of the following -

1. If you’re the type that cries at weddings, or sensitive (tak tentu pasal) do NOT watch p.s I Love You, alone.

2. If you have lost faith in Tom Cruise, do watch Tropic Thunder. Tom, I never knew you had it in ya!

3. If you bump into someone who makes your skin crawl.. who then asks for your number, look them straight in their eyes and say, “No, I don’t want to give my number to you..” . It is surprisingly liberating! *Hurrah for me… I actually did this last week!*

4. Do sing and dance to Mamma Mia the movie. I am willing to go with anybody out there who has an extra ticket to the show. Will pay for it. For guys – I am delicious and will not disappoint as a date, no strings attached (Bonus!). For girls – I am delicious and am a hoot.. (not to be confused with hooters..)

-delicious-hoot-mama-L

You know your trip will be great when..

.. You have a great lunch, get on the ERL train on time and no lines as you check in for your flight.

Flight was on time, and you have the whole row to yourself. Walk straight out of the customs into a white Mercedes Benz taxi and no traffic going to the hotel.

Looking fabulous in your heels (even after being in them since lunch) and sat on the front row of the fall/winter jewelry fashion show.

Positive feedbacks from your client even when everyone else is talking doom and gloom, healthy snacks with new found friends as you wait for your old dear friend to come over.

And he picks you up in his swanky Porsche, takes you to a nice collonial bungalow restaurant cum bar, talking and laughing as we catch up with each others lives.

Thank you for a wonderful yesterday, still riding high today, and looking forward to a better tomorrow!

-and-now-hunting-for-that-elusive-black-pumps-L